 Was it Chandler or Berger? |
Berger Roy Al
Swirling Eddies
Registration Date: 02-14-2003
Posts: 1,286
Location: I AM NOT insane!
 |
|
HAHAHAH!! My mistake Stewwart!
__________________
For the last time, I am NOT insane! gggxk
|
|
07-30-2004 12:01 |
|
|
sprinklerhead 
Ceremonial Kernel
Registration Date: 12-11-2003
Posts: 1,290
Location: Austin, TX
|
|
This reminds me of an old Dead Milkmen song.
STUART
you know what stuart? i like you. you're not like the other people here in the trailer park. oh no, don't get me wrong, they're fine people, good americans. but they're content to sit back, maybe watch a little mork and mindy on channel 57. maybe kick back a cool coors 16-ouncer. they're good fine people, stuart. but they don't know what the queers are doing to the soil. you know that johnny werzner kid - the kid who delivers papers in the neighborhood? he's a fine kid. some of the neighbors say he smokes crack, but i don't believe it. anyway, for his 10th birthday, all he wanted was a burrow owl, just like his old man. "dad, get me a burrow owl. i'll never ask for anything else as long as i live". so the guy breaks down and buys him a burrow owl. anyway at 10:30 the other night i go out into my yard and there's the werzner kid looking up in the tree. i said, "what are you looking for?" he said, "i'm looking for my burrow owl." i say, "jumping jesus on a pogo stick. everybody knows that a burrow owl lives in a hole in the ground. why the hell do you think they call it a burrow owl, anyway?" now stuart, do you think a kid like that is gonna know what the queers are doing to the soil? i first became aware of this, about 10 years ago, the summer my oldest boy bill jr. died. you know that carnival that comes to town every year? well this year it came with a ride called the mixer. the man said "keep your head and arms inside the mixer at all times." but bill jr., he was a daredevil., just like his old man. he was leaning out saying, "hey everybody, look at me, look at me". pow! he was decapitated. they found his head over by the snowcone concession. a few days after that, i open up the mail and there's a pamphlet in there, from pueblo, colorado. and it's addressed to bill jr. and it's entitled, "do you know what the queers are doing to our soil?" now stuart, if you look at the soil around any large u.s. city with a big underground homosexual population - des moines, iowa, perfect example. look at the soil around des moines, stuart. you can't build on it, you can't grow anything in it. the government says it's due to poor farming. but i know what's really going on, stuart. i know it's the queers. they're in it with the aliens. they're building landing strips for gay martians. i swear to god. you know what stuart, i like you. you're not like the other people, here in the trailer park.
__________________
I had another dream about lions at the door
They weren't half as frightening as they were before
But I'm thinking about eternity
And I'm wondering where the lions are...
I'm wondering where the lions are...
|
|
|
07-30-2004 13:26 |
|
|
audiori
Administrator
Registration Date: 03-12-2002
Posts: 11,145
Location: Missouri
|
|
__________________
"Blessed is he who expecteth nothing, for he shall enjoy everything" -St. Francis of Assisi
"A strange fanaticism fills our time: the fanatical hatred of morality, especially of Christian morality." - GK Chesterton
|
|
|
07-30-2004 13:57 |
|
|
|
